this post was submitted on 20 Oct 2026
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If that were the case, they would accept “my tubes are tied and I’ve additionally been on long term birth control since I was a teen and thus haven’t had periods or pregnancy risk in decades” or “I have not been sexually active in several years”
But they don’t, they say “just give us an estimate on when the last one was”
Tubal ligation and birth control, while wildly effective, aren't 100%. Plus, there are probably other reasons they want to know about menstruation other than pregnancy. They're just checking a box, let 'em get on with it.
I had my uterus yeeted in 2015 and I kept getting asked until my hair was so white they were willing to accept that I couldn't remember.
Yeah this is what I mean. We don't have to answer this question just because it's a checkbox on a form at the doctor's office. Sorry it took so long for them to accept what you were saying.
While the comment immediately below this is basically “rofl thats not a problem!”
Lemmy is a trip.. supposedly heavily leftist, which strongly implies feminist, but actually anything but..
At this point, im not at all convinced its actual leftism anymore. Its sounding more and more like Green MAGA everywhere I go.
On topic, I am still utterly appalled at how many stories I see about women's cancer being misdiagnosed by lazy/shithead physicians. I dont know what to do about it though, and frankly its depressing to see community after community willfully ignore the problem.
It gets my goat how leftist and progressive everyone pretends to be here only to see the most sexist shit get typed out into comments. It's maddening.
I've appreciated your comments in this thread a lot <3
I’ve been here for a long time fighting against the absolute dick-wavey crap this platform is. Idk if you have with other accounts, but if not:
first wave - lots of women came with during the api nonsense.
6mths later, most women driven off by a preponderance of bad behavior. Because the vast majority of commenting lemmy are shit men with shit opinions (don’t tell me I’m wrong, idgaf what you say, prove me wrong.)
Every other wave has been a repeat but with fewer women showing up each time. Because every man on this platform seems to think he has authority to speak about women’s issues, and women rightly nope the fuck out.
I genuinely wish I had some other platform to go to, I haven’t liked being here for a long time.. but at least it riles me up enough for my feminist flag to fly on fire. Maybe that helps someone.
We're in the same boat then (or just about anyway). I came here about 6 months ago and have made it a point to post more geared towards women and minorities to help bring a balance to this place.
It really helps! I know I feel better when I see others chiming in and pushing back against the blatant sexism. And I've had people reach out to me directly to thank me for being a loud feminist here.
I remember back to the early days of Reddit and how misogynistic it was then as well. It's still there, but there's so many women-centered communities that are lovely now! I'm stubborn enough to sit my ass on Lemmy and make change the same way. I'll keep an eye out for your username now :)
I’m glad that my voice helps. This account is over 3 yrs, which is OLD around here. And I’m pleased that you could go back to the day it was made and find the same sentiment I have now.
But it doesnt feel like it makes a difference. I know feminism is always an uphill battle, but it feels so pointless around here with so many faceless downvoters and all..
For a year or so early on I was actively encouraging women to find another platform. I considered joining beehaw’s new platform, but when asked about it they were kinda cagey so I just dropped it and stayed here.. just.. angry all the time 😩
It may as well be different people, no need to get that mad about people pretending
This place isn't that large, I recognize usernames. There's also certain topics that will bring out the misogyny from some of the more prolific Lemmy users.
To counter with another anecdote, my 55-yo wife never gets asked. When I showed her the comic she didn't understand it. Being Asian, she has no white hair, wrinkles and hasn't had a hysterectomy.
See my other comment about my oh-so-rare doc actually remembering who I am as a patient, even after not seeing me for a year.
Huh! So all that stuff about "it's vitally important information for the doctors to know before any treatment" either doesn't apply to her, or her doctors aren't competent, or it's just as bullshit as we always knew. Best of health to her. To you both.
Do you have to regularily answer when your last bowel movement was because it could be related?
No, of course not, not unless it seems -actually- related.
Thats not what women deal with. We are asked even when it is so wildly unlikely to be related (as comic above) as to be functionally impossible as a cause.
Because there’s a chance.
But no, sometimes there isn’t, and I will abort if I just happen to be wrong (something I tell my docs who are concerned I might be pregnant, because I have ZERO desire to have kids), give me my fucking healthcare.
No, but they are strong signs that the person is unconcerned with the hypothetical existence of a fetus so early in its term that they have not noticed it yet.
I don't answer that question unless it's pertinent to why I'm seeing a doctor in the first place. We don't have to give them this information every time.
It’s actually fairly relevant to your overall physiological functioning, hence why they want to know. Not sure why it’s such a sticking point for your doctor to ask a question about your physiological functioning, regardless of whether or not you think it’s relevant. Being a woman myself and a nurse, I understand that medical care is often lacking for women, but doctors assessing where you are in your menstrual cycle is not the reason why. In fact, I would be way more wary of a physician who doesn’t ask
The US is also in the middle of rolling back women's rights to bodily autonomy and tracking women having miscarriages in order to imprison them.
I don't give a fuck about giving my last period date if I'm seeing the doctor for a gunshot wound. My doctors don't push for a period date if I don't want to give one either.
Tell them it was in march of 1623
Edit: not really, even justifiably annoying a person whose attention to your situation could save your life is a bad idea, but that’s what I always want to tell them
I kinda do that, if they really push against my “are you serious? Genuinely serious?” I give them a date when I was 16, which was like 25 years ago, because its the last time I can reliably say I had one that wasn’t just hormone withdrawal (which is the actual reason the pill gives “periods” in the week of placebo pills, it’s not a real period)
My docs and nurses would genuinely find that funny af tho (their patents are mostly old men, and they find my levity quite disarming and enjoyable because they see me frequently enough for my kind of humor to be a hit) so I am gunna do that the next time they insist.
Honestly the technicians are probably required to fill out the date section of the form in order to proceed to the next tab. Doctors don't torture people for fun.
As someone who builds said forms: that is why we put "patient declined to answer" as an option along with "not applicable", "unknown" and other ways to get past the questions without having to put in a fake answer. "The computer won't let me keep going without you answering the question" is a weak-ass excuse.
Doesn’t mean I won’t fight it, because they don’t actually need to know for most reasons. When they actually need to know, they have ways of asking that eliminate doubt, like “hey you are trying to get a uterine ablation, which causes scar tissue in your uterus that prevents proper implantation of fertile eggs. We need to be entirely sure you are sterile before you get this proceedure done, and that you recognize the implications”. (A proceedure I have tried to have done but it failed because my cervix is amazing!!!! Powerful warrior cervix wouldn’t let boiling liquid or energetic mesh in!)
I fight against their data collection bullshit for fun and for others, because there’s no chance whatever that I’m pregnant and I know that. (tubal aside, I haven’t had sex in years and prefer my life that way. My tubal, at this point, is mostly BC in case of rape, I’m otherwise just not generally sexually active). I don’t need some asshole doctor accusing me of getting an abortion because my periods are basically never to begin with.
It’s not a requirement to move onto the next form.