this post was submitted on 06 Sep 2025
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I’m 31, my husband is 51, and lately I’ve been feeling some baby fever. For the record, kids aren’t a must for me, I’m genuinely happy with or without them, but I think it would be nice to experience that journey. My husband is hesitant, though. Even though he’s very healthy, active, and energetic, he feels like having a child in his 50s might be too late. He also already has a 27-year-old son, and he worries that the big age gap between siblings would feel strange.

I guess I’m just looking to hear what others think about this situation.

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[–] KittenBiscuits@lemmy.today 4 points 1 day ago

I just met my stepbrother last week despite our parents being together for several years now. He's 20-something years younger than I am (I'm almost 50 and he's in his twenties). If I think of him as stepparent's kid, it's not weird to me; similar to kids of close friends. If I think of him as stepbrother it feels strange. Maybe that's more to do with both of us being only children than the age gap.

Fortunately, we have enough in common that we got along really well!

I have a couple of friends that had a baby and the mom also had 2 teenage daughters (the baby is the dad's first kid; he was so excited to become a dad). The daughters seemed well adjusted to it. Your stepkid could be expecting you to want a kid of your own.

Why don't the 3 of you chat with a family therapist together to see if some of these concerns can be resolved or maybe aren't so much concerns at all.