this post was submitted on 06 Sep 2025
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I’m 31, my husband is 51, and lately I’ve been feeling some baby fever. For the record, kids aren’t a must for me, I’m genuinely happy with or without them, but I think it would be nice to experience that journey. My husband is hesitant, though. Even though he’s very healthy, active, and energetic, he feels like having a child in his 50s might be too late. He also already has a 27-year-old son, and he worries that the big age gap between siblings would feel strange.

I guess I’m just looking to hear what others think about this situation.

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[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 3 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Strictly speaking from a biological sense: whetever age the woman is when she has no eggs to fertilize.

[–] kunaltyagi@programming.dev 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

You can freeze eggs. Checkmate!!

[–] CoffeeJunkie@lemmy.cafe 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I hope that's a joke, but if not...women freezing eggs have sometimes encountered huge, huge problems. Huge financial problems, a quick search says 10-15K & often reaching 20K per egg freezing, retrieval procedure. Then $800/yr storage. Then costs for thawing & use. Tbf I see some lower quotes from New Hope but it's best to overestimate these costs & be pleasantly surprised when they're lower.

Freezing of eggs doesn't guarantee a successful pregnancy or healthy/live baby. A woman boldly wrote a piece called 'Freeze your eggs, free your career' and experienced a terrible, across the board dozen egg failure. At least she had the humility to share her story with the world, so they can see & learn from it. Takes a big person to admit maybe they were wrong.

I advise all wannabe future parents in their 20s to get to fucking. I don't personally advise having children, but obviously 20s are peak time if you can swing it. Biologically. It's not going to get any better.

I am immensely grateful for the egg freezing technology, how you can use it to cheat the infertility of cancer treatments, other bad medical conditions. But it's still a poor substitute for nature's plan, no guarantees, and I don't think it needs to be used by all women everywhere.

[–] kunaltyagi@programming.dev 1 points 22 hours ago

Good information!! Upvoted