this post was submitted on 18 Aug 2026
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badposting

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badposting is a comm where you post badly


This is not a !the_dunk_tank@hexbear.net alternative. This is not a !memes@hexbear.net alternative. This is a place for you to post your bad posts.

Ever had a really shitty bit idea? Joke you want to take way past the point of where it was funny? Want to feel like a stand-up comedy guy who's been bombing a set for the past 30 minutes straight and at this point is just saying shit to see if people react to it? Really bad pun? A homemade cringe concoction? A cognitohazard that you have birthed into this world and have an urge to spread like chain mail?


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    • Unauthorized goodposting is to be punished in the manner of commenting the phrase "GOOD post" followed by an emoji that has not yet been used in the thread
    • Use an emoticon/kaomoji/rule-three-abiding ASCII art if the rations run out
  2. This is not a comm where you direct people to other people's bad posts. This is a comm where you post badly.
  3. This rule intentionally left blank.
  4. If you're struck for rule 3, skill issue, not allowed to complain about it.

Code of Conduct applies just as much here as it does everywhere else. Technically, CoC violations are bad posts. On the other hand: L + ratio + get ~~better~~ worse material bozo

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[–] Snort_Owl@hexbear.net 18 points 2 days ago (1 children)

If we’re made in gods image it means god poops which means whoever made god thought it was cosmically funny

[–] NPa@hexbear.net 8 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Do you think God can drop a dookie so stank even He can't clean up in one wipe? Or is it heretical to even assume God doesn't use a bidet?

[–] Snort_Owl@hexbear.net 3 points 2 days ago

God has ibs and does not wash

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[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 21 points 2 days ago

Jesus was walking in the garden and one of the Pharisees said “O Rabbi, you say god is good yet god made poop.” Jesus dismounted his velociraptor and said “To the dung beetle, poop is good.” The Pharisees turned into stone or fire or whatever.

[–] ConcreteHalloween@hexbear.net 22 points 2 days ago (3 children)

What else are we supposed to do with solid waste? Sweat it out of our pours? That sounds way grosser.

[–] videogame@hexbear.net 13 points 2 days ago

Still poop but it comes out way cleaner and you don't even have to wipe

[–] Kefla@hexbear.net 8 points 2 days ago

Just let us breathe it out like we do with carbon

[–] chgxvjh@hexbear.net 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Some people have a bag attached to their belly. Not sure if that's a preferable alternative.

[–] ConcreteHalloween@hexbear.net 4 points 2 days ago

My grandpa had that. He seemed okay with it.

[–] Owl@hexbear.net 7 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Earlier organisms pooped out the same hole they ate with.

Now we have two separate holes.

But nothing has evolved the third digestive hole yet.

[–] Dort_Owl@hexbear.net 4 points 2 days ago
[–] Flyberius@hexbear.net 2 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Funny, I don't recall pissing out my arse

[–] ProletarianDictator@hexbear.net 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] ChatPPB@hexbear.net 1 points 1 day ago

Stop calling my cats.

[–] Owl@hexbear.net 1 points 1 day ago

That's not part of the digestive system.

[–] XiaCobolt@hexbear.net 12 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Isn't that why he sent his one and only son, Jesus, to tell us all to have a high fibre diet and drink more water?

Though it's been decades since I was in Sunday school.

[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 10 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Everyone forgets that the loaves used during the whole “loaves and fishes” scenario were jam packed with stone cut oats and whole grains.

[–] XiaCobolt@hexbear.net 5 points 2 days ago

Also fish because it's less inflammatory on the GIT system than red meat.

[–] infuziSporg@hexbear.net 7 points 2 days ago

Maybe this is what "Man cannot live on bread alone" was all about

[–] Snort_Owl@hexbear.net 7 points 2 days ago

Don’t forget not eating things you’re intolerant too

[–] Sanctus@anarchist.nexus 15 points 2 days ago

Pooping if it was actually designed intelligently:

tRd3l03bifWAmDl.png

[–] Salah@hexbear.net 8 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I can’t think of a more efficient way to get rid of waste than releasing a daily brown log from our backsides.

[–] CliffordBigRedDog@hexbear.net 6 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

For me its more like brown water 3 times a day

[–] Salah@hexbear.net 8 points 2 days ago

That sounds slightly less efficient

[–] ChatPPB@hexbear.net 3 points 2 days ago (2 children)

This is why he makes himself a child-touch with a modern-time low self-esteem

[–] Kefla@hexbear.net 13 points 2 days ago (1 children)

catgirl-disgust Sorry ChatPPB, this one's a miss

[–] Salah@hexbear.net 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] ChatPPB@hexbear.net 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I think it's weird how it's such a dumb premise that he's quite completely incapable of thinking and will be won. But like, the gist of it is he has that's why I don't know much about it.

[–] Salah@hexbear.net 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] ChatPPB@hexbear.net 3 points 2 days ago

That's what I've heard about it, that's just not to say it's it and not really

[–] infuziSporg@hexbear.net 7 points 2 days ago (1 children)

What, would you rather we were single-chamber filter feeders?

[–] Snort_Owl@hexbear.net 7 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] infuziSporg@hexbear.net 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

That's like if you had your cloaca in your mouth. It'd smell like farts all the time.

[–] Snort_Owl@hexbear.net 2 points 1 day ago

Don’t threaten me with a good time

[–] chgxvjh@hexbear.net 7 points 2 days ago (2 children)

What's the alternative, not pooping and just filling up like a baloon.

[–] Helios44@hexbear.net 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Not needing to eat, so we don't need a digestive tract, and therefore no poop

[–] chgxvjh@hexbear.net 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I recall some old reddit thread where somebody actually did that. Nuked their gut biome and switched to a liquid diet. No more poop.

[–] Helios44@hexbear.net 2 points 1 day ago

Well I meant like not needing to eat anything (including drinking) in general.

[–] GoodGuyWithACat@hexbear.net 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

No, it's physical proof of our original sin. You think Adam and Eve were pooping before they got that apple?

[–] Kefla@hexbear.net 13 points 2 days ago

What were their buttholes for lea-think

Well, out the front of the face was tried, but they kept getting sick.

[–] microfiche@hexbear.net 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I mean, god doesn't exist but buttholes and shit isnt the thing that's gonna clinch it for us.

[–] sleeplessone@lemmy.ml 13 points 2 days ago

You sure? Buttholes are great at clinching.

[–] Calfpupa@lemmy.ml 4 points 2 days ago

Don't judge other dieties fetishes!

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