Ask questions and don't assume you somehow know a person or their life better than they do. Nothing more annoying than a person attempting to "help" but ends up coming across as a condescending dismissive asshole.
this post was submitted on 06 Sep 2026
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Have you tried essential oils?
Mindfulness. Note your behaviors. Note what leads to your behaviors. It'll give you insight into what in your life and in your mind leads to "kind" actions as well as what leads to "unkind" actions, which is a huge part of the effort to become more kind.
I wouldn't call it mindfulness because that has a weird spiritual undertone but I fully agree.
I specifically wanna highlight that the most important actions of kindness are small things and whenever you remember to be kind you will automatically respond that way, because it will be your modus operandi in social interactions. It sounds cliche but the truth is if you prioritize it, it sticks in your mind and often those tiny interactions reflect what is important to you.
That said of course this is not a substitute for taking the effort too. Sometimes it's annoying to say an extra phrase of kindness but it's important.
Take extra time to consider other peoples' perspectives or take notice if they're acting different than usual. You might be able to make them smile when they need it, or understand their frustration a little better or even find a way to help them without them having to ask. Some people want help but don't know how to express it, so paying some extra attention can let you figure it out without making it seem like they're being needy or whatever.
Paying anybody a small compliment is free.
unless it's at work and they contact HR for harassment.
my work has specific guidelines on what compliments are permissible in the workplace.
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If you see a nail on the road, pick it up
Look people into the eyes and smile a little whenever you talk to them. Everytime. After a while, learn to smile bigger. Then learn to actually smile while talking.
No, that's creepy/weird as fuck.
Smile when you genuinely feel something. Don't be fake and try to manipulate people.
Also, you must be American? Only Americans have this weird obsession with smiling constantly and thinking that if you aren't smiling you're an asshole.
All your assumptions are wrong. Should I say something about your IQ now? /s
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When you go through a self-closing door and someone is just a few steps behind you, keep it open.
Be careful where you do this. If you have to scan a badge to enter someplace like your office DO NOT DO THIS!
Context is important. That is for sure.
A few years ago we had an situation at an old office of mine. Someone held the door for a person who wasn't an employee(the employee was trying to nice and assumed the other person worked there, with like 900 people in the building you can't know everyone). Women commonly left there purses at their desk and some men left their wallets. This other guy walked around the cubicles while everyone was getting coffee/tea/water before starting and just grabbed all the purses and wallets. He stole from like 30 people, walked out a back door and was never found.
and what do you do when you do this and they call you an asshole or scowl at you?
I've never experienced that. Either the people are thankful or do not react at all.
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For someone who is too far gone to be kind, staying away from other people is a great kindness.
Say "hi" with a smile, to people you pass by, even if it's fake. The end results are the same to the recipients.
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