ERM, actually, didn't he kill Jobs family? (Not like it makes it any better. Imagine someong killing your family, then gives you 2 extra families in the future)
this post was submitted on 28 Oct 2026
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Hey now, how can someone who tortured Job for shit and giggles not be a good guy :)
I think that's my favorite story. God killed Job's family to win a bet and then just gave him a new wife and children. Because women and children are perfectly interchangeable. As long as you ended up with the same number no harm was done. And his wife and children themselves suffering and dying? Don't worry about it.
Also, Lucifer his wings were ripped off and he was banned to the underworld forever because he was asking God to give humans another chance and to have some trust in the human ability to learn from their mistakes (after Adam and Eve ate from the apple). God wouldn't have it. Humans made a single mistake and they shall be punished forever. Such a nice guy.
If I had to choose between God and Jeffrey Dahmer, I choose Dahmer. Dahmer doesn't give children leukemia.
The other angels be like:
Did this many of you seriously manage to read that without getting unreasonably annoyed and distract by the "dirt" on your screens? Like damn.. I even took all my meds today and still couldn't get past that.
I swear, the drama with these two!
Satan has an interesting position in Faust
Xtians certainly modeled themselves after god pretty well.
The only account we have of Satan is in the Bible. Not exactly an unbiased source.
If you think of God as just a collective narcissistic projection of human dysfunction, authoritarianism, and self-preservation, then it makes a lot more sense as to why God’s “love” seems so abusive.
You have encountered Gnostic thought (and related heresies!) The Gnostics believed that the God of the Christian Old Testament was actually Satan all along. It is an interesting rabbit hole to fall down into.
It's interesting to think of the world religions that could have been, had the scales of power dipped in different directions. Gnosticism is an interesting take on Abrahamic religions, almost like a blend of Christianity and Buddhism.
There were even literal Greek Buddhists before there were Greek Christians. Heck, Christianity as we know it might not have survived without the original Greek drafts of the New Testament. There's another universe out there where the eastern Greco-Romans were way too busy with the karmic cycle and achieving enlightenment to worry about the execution of some random guy with daddy issues in the desert.
Some say Jesus was actually influenced a lot by Buddhist philosophy or even has been to India
God that sounds like such a better world.
Yeah I'm pretty sure the giant Buddha statue that the Taliban blew up in Afghanistan several years ago was Greek work.
There are also plenty of accounts from (I think) the Abassid empire where Greeks and Buddhists were both present in Baghdad at the same time. I forget why that ended, maybe because of the Seljuks or the Mongols, can't remember.
And of course, there's an account in the Buddhist canon of a philosophical debate between a buddhist monk (Nagasena) and a Greek king named Menander (Milinda in Pali), which took place in the first or second century BC.
But damn... thinking about a world where Greco-Buddhism became the religion of the West... what could've been, eh?
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Well, I'm not not gnostic. Or aagnostic, if you will.
Austrian Agricultural Nostic?
Ok, so now I'm wondering if Milton read the Gnostic texts. I'm still amazed that the church approved the publication of Paradise Lost, much less Paradise Regained.
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Gnosis
Yeah, i got in a bunch of trouble for that line of thinking in Sunday School.
They were, however, unable to scare the logic out of me.
God is a narcissistic fuck
He's full of human emotions for some reason. Wonder why?
Definitely an abusive parent
Well, no. If you're taking a stack of supposed moral allegories as fact, Lucifer was cast out for defying God, not for being naughty. Lucifer wouldn't kneel to mankind and serve them, thinking them lesser, so God tossed him out. Again, if you think myths are facts.
Look, I don't know what to tell to you "atheists." I met the devil last week and she was utterly forthright and honest in the reason for her expulsion from heaven. Clams. Paella, specifically. She has no idea where people got this rebellion thing.
I was told it was pineapple on pizza and tbh that seemed completely justified.
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That's medieval fanfic built over badly translated old testament passages that are talking about local kings and it's literally in the previous and next passages that they weren't talking about any angel... the only thing about being cast out is in Revelations after a war in heaven, that is said the dragon is the same as the serpent, the serpent that told humans that god lied that the fruit would kill them but instead would give us knowledge of good and evil, so literally pushed us towards developing philosophy and sciences, and that war is narrated just after god wipes a third of humanity in one go, turns the oceans into blood, send plagues, famine, beetles that sting like scorpions, and tortured the rest of humanity that for months would look for death and not find it and good were the mothers who smashed their babies against the rocks etc etc etc, that's what the dragon rose up against
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Anyone who has done DMT knows that the Cosmic Serpent, the green lady, the insectoid creatures, the scary clowns, the machine elves . . . . while scary to us, are benevolent, welcoming and healing. I have always felt that the serpent in the tree of knowledge (Ayahuasca) was the good guy.
puff puff .... pass bro
Namaste
Interesting. I still have you tagged from that time you said "I like shoot dog."
The goal is to get you to accept that "your betters" can never do wrong and when you suffer consequences it's due to a greater plan you are not privy to rather than letting you hold them accountable. The intent is to get you to accept without question the authority and judgement of the powers that be du jour, whether it's the king, the rich, the state... whatever needs to pacify you enough to keep you productive and docile. Satan therefore represents and embodies all of the human qualities of self-determination and true freedom.
Satan was a very minor character in The Bible.
Given how much thought a lot of superfans of the Bible give to him, you'd think he was the protagonist.
Maybe they're secret shippers.
Cain = Satan = same ol story through the game of telephone of history
🌕️🧑🚀🔫🧑🚀
“Knowledge forbidden?
Suspicious, reasonless. Why should their Lord
Envy them that? Can it be a sin to know?
Can it be death?”
― John Milton, Paradise Lost
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