this post was submitted on 04 Feb 2026
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No Stupid Questions

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Like, if you accidentally cut someone off, and they get mad and honk, how do you apologize?

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[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 1 points 54 seconds ago* (last edited 25 seconds ago)

I wave the back of my hand with all my fingers up except my thumb, index, ring, and pinky

[–] deacon@lemmy.world 1 points 15 minutes ago

I find that rolling over and showing my belly, while impractical, is reliably effective at diffusing these situations.

[–] fizzle@quokk.au 2 points 50 minutes ago

I usually wave at them as though I think they're a friend of mine just saying hello.

[–] Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world 1 points 40 minutes ago

Usually just a wave, but I'll give a full blown "I have no idea what I'm doing!" shrug if I REALLY messed up.

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 2 points 1 hour ago

Usually I point at them aggressively to get their attention and then start miming Gluck glucking to show them how much of a dumb whore I am.

I don't think it's working though, usually they just flip me off and look real angry.

[–] deranger@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 hours ago

Look ashamed and maybe do a single flash of my hazards.

[–] Crazyslinkz@lemmy.world 56 points 4 hours ago (1 children)
[–] Zonetrooper@lemmy.world 18 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

This. It says, "I acknowledge you are upset, and accept blame."

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 6 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

Instructions unclear. Ended up doing the wave (like you see at baseball stadiums) alone in a car.

[–] leadore@lemmy.world 4 points 2 hours ago

Accidentally dabbed.

[–] Septimaeus@infosec.pub 14 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago) (3 children)

(Edit: real answer) For most acknowledgements, I double-tap a light — beams, brakes, or hazards depending on current lighting conditions and relative position of other driver — because most things I would say to them are two beats long:

  • “Thank you”
  • ”Sorry”
  • “My bad”
  • ”Go on”
  • ”Nice drift”
  • ”You drunk?”
[–] fizzle@quokk.au 1 points 52 minutes ago

because most things I would say to them are two beats long

LOL. Doesn't that mean it's completely ambiguous? There's plenty of awful things you could say in 2 beats.

I imagine that people flash twice because once could be a mistake, twice demonstrates intent. Three would make me wonder whether it's an ongoing flashing light.

[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 18 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

I once got an A on an anthropology paper by analyzing body language in vehicles and different driving cultures in different places.

[–] Septimaeus@infosec.pub 9 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

Rock on. Were there any instances of local parlance you found peculiar or surprising?

[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 4 points 1 hour ago

One insight was the different behavior when a light turned green with someone at the front making a left turn.

Where I grew up that person would just have to wait, but in the city where I went to college they’d let one car turn left before opposing traffic started.

It was a bit of a culture shock being honked at for obeying the actual law.

[–] SendMePhotos@lemmy.world 7 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

I remember reading a while back that the hazards twice = thank you.

[–] Septimaeus@infosec.pub 2 points 2 hours ago

I’d certainly interpret it that way if it fit.

The only issue I’d see with that convention is that in many scenarios in which you’d use it — other driver makes room for you to merge, brakes early to let you turn left, and so forth — you (should) already have half of the hazard lights actively repeating, which could muddle the message. But otherwise I like it.

Another random convention I learned early on was rapid triple-tap beams (i.e., like a strobe) = “speed trap ahead”

[–] sik0fewl@piefed.ca 12 points 3 hours ago

I usually just honk “SORRY” in Morse code.

[–] MantisToboggon@lemmy.world 28 points 4 hours ago (3 children)

I have a huge purple dildo. I just start beating myself about the head and shoulders.

[–] Rhoeri@piefed.world 14 points 3 hours ago

Otherwise known as a catholic penance.

[–] UndulyUnruly@lemmy.world 21 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

What about the “sorry, my bad” while driving though?

[–] actionjbone@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 hours ago

You can do that at the same time as beating yourself with the purple dildo

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 5 points 3 hours ago

Mantis starts beating off with a purple dildo

Me: "...the fuck is he doing?"

[–] BenderRodriguez@lemmy.world 12 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago)

Sorry? Hell naw. Double down. Make it their fault. Get even more mad than them. Brandish your gun. Then brandish your second gun. Fire a warning shot towards their vehicle. Finish your beer in case you need to get out of the car. Challenge other driver to fisticuffs. Lose. Go home and explain to wife why you lost another fight. Get sad. Go to bar. Get really drunk. Pass out on stoop of the Wayne County Building. Miss work for the 3rd time this month. Get fired. Get kicked out of house by wife. Move into bachelor apartment. No artwork on walls. Only Kroger brand bread, condiments, and cheese slices in fridge. See kids every other weekend. Start going to AA meetings on a whim. Find new job. Hit the gym. Find new hobbies. Meet new girlfriend. Come to terms with faults and find peace through meditation and mindfulness. Experience growth. Drive to work one day. Accidentally cut a guy off. Double down...

[–] hperrin@lemmy.ca 10 points 3 hours ago

Just hit their car slightly with yours. You know, a love tap, to show them love and appreciation. Then show them your extended middle finger, signifying that you are standing with them in solidarity of thinking you’ve made a mistake. If you have a weapon with you, you can hold it up and show them to indicate that you are aware you could be perceived as a threat, but are making the effort to indicate that you aren’t.

[–] supersquirrel@sopuli.xyz 17 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

I think the fact that there isn't a good way I think escalates a lot of otherwise defusable road rage situations.

[–] snooggums@piefed.world 6 points 3 hours ago

Many people who get angry at strangers easily see someone apologizing as legitimatizing their anger, and people not apologizing as not understanding they are wrong. I don't think there is a good solution if people can't just accept that other people make mistakes and move on without any needed follow up.

[–] joyjoy@lemmy.zip 8 points 3 hours ago

Can't go wrong with the classic 🖕. 

[–] Rhoeri@piefed.world 5 points 3 hours ago

Lean into it and just flick them off. Unless you’re in America, because there, that shit will let you killed.

[–] snooggums@piefed.world 4 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

I don't, because being polite while driving is being unpredictable and that makes things more dangerous.

Instead I do what I want others to do which is just do a better job of paying attention and driving consistently. Making mistakes happen, just refocus and avoid making more.

[–] Ryanmiller70@lemmy.zip 4 points 2 hours ago

This was me when I got off work today. I was trying to pass someone in front of me on the highway and signaled to move into the left lane. Did my usual couple seconds, saw nobody in my mirrors, and proceeded to move. Ended up cutting someone off that was in my blind spot. They honked and tried to run me off the road in response. I just kept driving like normal cause what happened happened. Dude followed me all the way back to my exit, so I decided instead of going home I'd drive through town. He eventually gave up and turned around to get back on the highway.

[–] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago)

If I have some free time, I’ll follow them to their destination and knock on their window before they manage to slip away, and then apologize. Many seem like they’re in a hurry, despite just arriving, so I’ll just shout out my apology as I knock on their window. Depending on how bad I felt, I might try to repeat the apology next week, seeing whether I can find them on the road or their destination at the same time

[–] Aremel@lemmy.zip 7 points 4 hours ago (2 children)

I flash my hazards for a sec. I also use that to say thank you.

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 2 points 3 hours ago

No no no. First you do the walk like an egyptian dance. Then flash your hazzards. Then play peekaboo.

[–] sem@piefed.blahaj.zone 2 points 3 hours ago

This is the only correct answer.

[–] slothrop@lemmy.ca 6 points 3 hours ago

I pretend to shoot myself in the temple.
Then I put the gun back in the glove box.

[–] Nemo@slrpnk.net 4 points 3 hours ago

One hand vertically in from of sternum, wry expression.

[–] DrFistington@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago

I've had this thought before. Like we've got dozens of ways to show insult or anger with a hand gesture, but no universal way to apologize with one

[–] ThePowerOfGeek@lemmy.world 6 points 4 hours ago

Back of the hand high and visible through the rear window, fingers and thumb slightly apart to reduce the chances of them thinking your giving them the middle finger (or two fingers in the UK).

[–] MutantTailThing@lemmy.world 5 points 4 hours ago

Honk louder to assert dominance.

[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 3 points 3 hours ago
[–] Archangel1313@lemmy.ca 4 points 4 hours ago (2 children)

Wave like an idiot, and pray they don't have a gun.

[–] BenderRodriguez@lemmy.world 5 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago)

spoilerTHEY DO

[–] DeathByBigSad@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 hours ago

I remember not feeling in a good mood and I was sitting in the passenger seat and I pressed the steeing wheel to do the BEEP thing, cuz the car in the front wasn't moving when they're supposed to (like I think maybe red light just turned green or something and I was tired and wanna go home), and my parents was like "don't fucking do that, Americans are crazy, they get easily pissed off and they'll fucking shoot us dead"

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 3 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago)

Slam on the brakes to assert you are a power bottom, hope for a love tap

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