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I love you
I used to work for a consultancy that tried to bill themselves as experts in VR/AR. This is back in 2017 or so. We helped a client make a 3D tracking system with VR/AR applications, and this client let us kind of run with it.
Anyway, I was sort of head of this AR/VR thing, and we were always desperate for free advertising, so I somehow got pulled to provide my thoughts on the impact of VR/AR on the grocery store industry for an article in "The Grocer" or some other industry mag.
Leading up to the call, I was trying to think of what I'd say. My thoughts were on building out virtual grocery stores to test customer reactions before building them for real. Bring in some test subjects, see how they plan their route, how they react to different placements of goods. Track their eye movements to see if the new end-cap design is working. Time how long they spend in the store, etc. Are the aisles too narrow and claustrophobic. I got the idea from another client who was using VR to test out new detergent bottle concepts (apparently a one-off of a blow-molded bleach bottle is crazy expensive).
Well my consultancy had been purchased by a multinational conglomerate a year or so prior, so I got a phone call from some C-suite ass who wanted to brief me on what they wanted me to say to the magazine.
His idea was a service where you could have a store employee wear some kind of camera rig so the customer could sit at home in VR and pilot the employee around the store. This would essentially replace curbside pickup, but with the added benefit of "allowing the customer to pick which apple they want out of the bunch."
I resolved to ignore that advice, but the whole magazine thing ended up falling through anyway. I quit within the year.
Is this why I can’t buy a steam machine?
“Im sorry Sylvia we’re going to have to let you go. You didn’t say ‘thank you’ enough.
It says here you were obsessed with someone named ‘Hank Ewe’. Absolutely deplorable. “
That's stupid. They use use AI to say please and thank you for their employees.
"Welcome to Burger King where you r-PLEASE... Would you like to try our THANK YOU"
I went to Wendy’s the other day, and they have this automatic pre-recorded English-fluent woman cheerfully ask for your order. While an actual person didn’t indicate that they were ready, I know they won’t do a second intro message either way, so I started to order. A heavy spanish accent comes over the speaker “Fucking wait, god.” My only thought was “Fair enough” and I waited.
Whoever implements these systems is crazy. We don’t pay people enough to be policed that heavily.
The first time I went to Wendy's and it ran into that AI thing I complained to the manager, politely because I know it's not their fault, but I just wanted to make my dislike of it known for them to tell their higher ups or whatever. She did say that you can just ask for a human. But I did make sure to be very clear that I was wasn't just being a Karen.
artificial authoritarianism in action!
My SO works at a callcenter and they get dinged for the use of what they call "tragic phrases." These include, but aren't limited to:
- "Unfortunately"
- Words/phrases that imply uncertainty like "should"
- Words/phrases that imply non-commitment like "I can't do that" or "that's against policy" or "that's not my dept"
- So-called sloppy words/phrases like "No problem" or "hold on just a sec"
Its fucking ridiculous. They pay some outside vendor for training and guidelines.
As a customer, I would feel much more comfortable talking to someone who doesn’t sound like they have a gun to their head.
God dam, that's horrible. Unfortunately it's not my department but I should let you know your not alone, now hold on a sec while I transfer you to purgatory
I'm so glad I can mouth off to customers in my line of work, not that I abuse the privilege but sometimes a customer needs to be told they are a fucking idiot and they could of flooded or burnt the place down.
non-commitment like "I can't do that" or "that's against policy" or "that's not my dept"
Ok, I'm not a native English speaker but... I have the feeling that they don't know what non-commitment means. Unless it's commitment to fuck the customer, but then, why bother to offer a call center?
Oh hey, that's almost exactly the kind of cyberpunk dystopia that I grew up reading fiction about:
No one asked for this
It's the C-suite. They're so corporatized they can't differentiate between an over-the-top professional smile and somebody being genuinely helpful.
The capitalists running everything did
Went to Burger King, they spit on my onion rings
See, if they had AI back in Eminem’s day, this never would’ve happened.
As if that were the reason people don't go to Burger King
The last time I had BK that wasn't trash was at the Honolulu airport, that was October 2024 and I think I've stopped at BK once since and it was horrible. Not to mention Canadian sizes are much much smaller it seems. Like fuck I used to buy the chicken sandwichs and now they are like half the size and the chickens shit
They're not supposed to put chicken shit on the sandwich unless you specifically request it.
Computer, how many R's in "thank you?"
This'll turn out great, for sure.
You could make Burger King nearly infinitely better by PUTTING THE CHEESE ON THE BURGER TO MELT, YOU PRIMITIVES
Not like I was going to burger king anyway but this is a solid reason not to
I wish I could explain to companies how fucking awkward and horrible it feels to be on the receiving end of forced gratitude. Even if I liked the restaurant, I wouldn't be able to go if they did this.
I guess it's no surprise that rich people think the experience is still the same with or without the consent of the providing party.
FORCING Minimum Wage workers to say Please and Thank You will ENSURE that their FOOD QUALITY will go UP while Prices go Affordable!
Cargo cult happiness.
They cant keep staff as it is, so this?
This is the worst timeline. 1984 was a warning not an instruction manual.
And Idiocracy was a comedy not a documentary
it was too optimistic
If only we lived in a world where the President of the United States went and recruited the smartest person in the world to solve the most difficult problems
In a way, that is what DOGE ~~attempted to be~~ was sold as...by people who don't understand what smart is supposed to mean...and ~~ended up getting grifted~~ was really a grift, because that is as far as they all can imagine smart to be.
DOGE was the grift, run by a grifter
I regret choosing the red pill; this reality is getting worse and worse. Can I go back to the 90s Matrix?
Can I go back to the 90s Matrix?
I've g̵o̴t̴ ̷ s̴̗̺͕͝o̴̜͐̊̇m̷̨͍͍͠e̴̹̕ ̵̡̿ ę̷͕̣͂̆̅r̵̡̪̈͂́̄̔͠r̶͍̲̤̀̏͋͑í̵̹̼̮̩͈̰̊͌͂b̴̯̎̎̅̕ļ̶̘͓̍ē̶̥̺̥̓̉̈͆͘̚n̸͚̳͉̫̪̣͔̬̈́̀̄̉̂̊͆̾̍̀͝ę̴͚͔̺̮̤̺̰͈̖̉̀̃̄̏̾͛ŵ̶̪͓͓͇̥̮̠̩̼̙̻̰͠s̸̼͖̬̦̟̝͊́̓́ ̷̡̨̢̫̖͔͚̻͙̩̈́̆͛̾̿̓̏͑̀̊̈ ̵̺̹͙̼̮̹͍̗̱͇̪͈͑͛̅͜͜f̶̣͊͂̾̾̈͝ǫ̶̛͇̥̖͓̦̳͇̩͙̩͑̇̾̇͊̋͌̇̍̃̏̈́͛̕ͅr̶͚͇̄ͅ ̴̌̋̓̄͊͂͋̈̀̇͐̀͘̕ ̷̡̨̖̺̫͈̪̫̲̩̘͉͚̗̳̖̜̗̣̭̩̩͕̙̯̦͔̟̠̝̣͎̝͍͇̝̅ͅỳ̷̨̛̛̤̹̖̞̙̺̮͇̳̙̤̟̘̦̙̃̄́̄̂̃̊̂̈́̿͛̇̍̀̌̍̎̊͑͗̆̔͘̚̕̕͝ͅơ̴̢̛͇͓̗͍͙̮̲̣̳͖͉͕̳̹̤̩̜̥͔̲̘̩̳̱̩͙̹̝̾͋͐̿͋̀͗̏̀͂͊͗̋̽͐̀̕͜͜͝ǔ̵̡͚͎̗͈̞̱͖̖͎̬̱̜̲͖͈̳̼̥͎́̊̊͐̀͑̈̀̍̂͋͐͆͒̚̕͘͘ͅ.̵̨̨̢̢̨͍̦̻̼̖̩̮̱̣̭̲̼͈̱̭̭͇̺͈̠̲̬̭͍͎̝̮͕̳͕͙̳̺͔̗̪̖̳̙̯͖̥̈́̿͌̌͊̽̈́̈́͛͋̏́̉̊͂̑̄͂̄̈̌͐͆̍̐͒̿̂͘͜͝͝ͅͅͅ
Welcome to Burger King, I love you. Welcome to Burger King, I love you. Welcome to Burger King, I love you...
Yeah, I really don't care about the forced speech they do. Organic, natural speaking is way better than a script, and I don't require anyone at their job to say welcome, please, etc. It's a stupid solution in search of a problem.
Of course, I also don't eat at burger king or their rivals, so I doubt they care. Increase the quality, decrease the price. That's what would get me to go.
Cool, so AI will be replacing the managers first.
why don't they focus on fixing their cold soggy fries and shit-tier "burgers" first
No Kings!
Haha they just can't help but try and shove ai into everything. Down our fucking throats