this post was submitted on 16 Jun 2026
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Yesterday I got sprayed with garter snake musk and I need to feel better about myself

top 45 comments
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[–] sharkweek@sopuli.xyz 9 points 7 hours ago

I worked at an abbatoire for a while. Dodged the worst stuff no problem ... except for one time with green puss from an abscess in a cow. It must have been under a lot of pressure.

I cut the abscess out and showed it to a woman I didn't like in quality control. She threw up. It was my fault, so I had to clean that up, and I didn't get to go home early to clean myself.

It was not a great job.

[–] ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works 7 points 7 hours ago

I used to harvest shellfish for a job, and we used pressurized water to help dig down. There's a whole lot of dead beach and low tide thst I blasted myself with, but there'd be some big ol honking horseclams 3 feet under the sand that closed off and died down there a long time before my hose found the cavity of its putrefied liquified remains.

Having that propelled in a blast along with sand and seaweed was s fun time.

[–] discocactus@lemmy.world 10 points 9 hours ago

Norovirus vomit.

[–] ComfortableRaspberry@feddit.org 8 points 9 hours ago

Not "sprayed" per se but it seems squirrel monkeys pee on their hands and touch stuff to mark it. One of these guys was sitting at the back of my neck when they decided it's time to clarify who owns what. So he started to pee on his hands while still sitting there and most of it ran down my spine. The he proceeded to touch my hair and clothes.

The smell was tolerable but being covered in monkey pee still was something I hadn't on my radar..

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 9 points 9 hours ago* (last edited 9 hours ago)

I've been skunked before.

Which smelled bad (understatement), but didnt feel gross. Meanwhile, the solution being to wash yourself with tomato sauce felt hella icky.

[–] cheeseburger@lemmy.ca 8 points 9 hours ago

Anal gland squeezings from my cat. I didn't want to spend another $300 at the vet and did it myself. The horrors.

[–] OriginEnergySux@lemmy.world 29 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

I used to work at a fish packing factory and had to get something out of a skip bin and i fell getting in. I was drenched in rotting fish guts and green slime that had been sitting for a couple of days out in the heat of the Aussie QLD summer (around 40C)

[–] Deconceptualist@leminal.space 10 points 9 hours ago* (last edited 9 hours ago) (1 children)

Yep I threw up a little in my mouth. Congratulations, I guess.

Why the fuck am I even reading this thread...

[–] wabafee@lemmy.world 2 points 8 hours ago
[–] kboos1@lemmy.world 50 points 14 hours ago* (last edited 14 hours ago) (2 children)

Doing electrical work in a chicken rendering plant. I was sprayed with the liquefied remains of chickens that were at least a week old coming out of a tanker truck into a pit that was outside with a sea of flys covering it like a tarp. To make it worse, I looked over at a guy 10ft away eating a bowl of fruit loops like it was a normal day, that experience changed my life because I never want that to me my normal.

[–] yakko@feddit.uk 13 points 14 hours ago

That's ten times worse than mine but oddly similar. Some stupid friends and me once shot a canned whole chicken with 454 Casull at close range. I might still have the footage somewhere, it was like a fireworks shell of protein.

[–] sblxck@lemmy.ml 15 points 14 hours ago

I think you win this round

[–] Okokimup@lemmy.world 12 points 13 hours ago (2 children)

Squeezed pus out of a cyst for my brother. It shot out and got me in the eye. Thank dog I wear glasses.

Not directly sprayed, but someone shot of pepper spray in the restaurant I worked at years ago as a prank. Couldn't breath right the rest of the night.

[–] CaptainMan251@lemmy.world 4 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Ah, yes, the funny prank where we spray blinding, painful particles everywhere. As a human i too think this is hilarious.

WHY DO THEY DO THOSE THINGS T_T

I was sitting outside of an anime con rave with some friends when people started streaming out of the rave in a hurry. Someone had set off pepper spray in the middle of the crowd. Never fully found out why but the two stories I heard were either that a guy got way too handsy with a girl or someone just did it for the lulz. (Either way it was a bad time for a lot of people and the paramedics had to be called for a few folks.)

[–] Hadriscus@jlai.lu 1 points 11 hours ago

Reminds me of that scene from Planet Terror... in the hospital

[–] velma@sh.itjust.works 20 points 14 hours ago

Worked at a restaurant hood cleaning company once. Sometimes the techs had to bring back buckets of grease they removed from a place because there's a lot of rules around where you can dispose of it.

Walked into the shop at the wrong time and got hit in the chest with a spray of rancid, black grease. Had to throw those clothes away because I couldn't get it out.

[–] Jarix@lemmy.world 2 points 9 hours ago

Human piss grossest.

Worst thing was gasoline covered head to toe when a hose sprung a leak when I was working as a full service gas station attendant. I'm glad it wasnt propane though

[–] infinitevalence@discuss.online 16 points 15 hours ago (2 children)

I have 2 kids so, vomit, poop, blood, mucus, and even breast milk.

[–] CaptainMan251@lemmy.world 20 points 14 hours ago* (last edited 14 hours ago) (1 children)

You should work in healthcare. It's like that, but adults, and everyone is yelling.

[–] Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world 8 points 14 hours ago

Beat me to it

[–] velma@sh.itjust.works 7 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

I'd take being sprayed with breast milk over any of the other substances any day of the week.

Though since I've been there myself, yeah I've had all of these sprayed on me as well haha

[–] AmidFuror@fedia.io 0 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

So, more than clean water?

[–] velma@sh.itjust.works 5 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago) (1 children)

More than any of the other substances the original comment had listed.

[–] AmidFuror@fedia.io 5 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

That reading is obvious upon retrospect.

[–] velma@sh.itjust.works 1 points 16 minutes ago

Happens to the best of us :)

[–] TryingToBeGood@reddthat.com 8 points 13 hours ago

Damn, reading these makes my horse piss look positively tame.

[–] Beth@piefed.social 10 points 14 hours ago (3 children)

Healthcare…you get numb to a lot. But honestly I can’t stand phlegm.

[–] CaptainMan251@lemmy.world 3 points 9 hours ago

Toothpaste spit for me. I will look away and tell them to spit, and then hold it at arms length to the sink while looking away.

[–] Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world 6 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Also my ick. I absolutely hate a successful mucus plug dislodgement

[–] Beth@piefed.social 5 points 14 hours ago

Even reading it made my toes curl a little, haha.

[–] thesohoriots@lemmy.world 4 points 14 hours ago (1 children)
[–] Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world 2 points 12 hours ago

C dif has never bothered me for some reason

[–] kindenough@kbin.earth 8 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

My baby sons ass while changing a diaper…

[–] neidu3@sh.itjust.works 6 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago) (2 children)

Same. Parenthood brings a whole new perspective on bodily fluids.

GF, after gettingback feom the store: "Any reason why my hairbrush is on the floor?"
Me watchingour toddler: "Don't touch, it'sfull of poop!"
GF: ...

[–] kindenough@kbin.earth 1 points 7 hours ago

Hihihi..

From then on I turned is ass 90 degrees away from me when changing diapers.

[–] CaptainMan251@lemmy.world 1 points 9 hours ago

That is such a loving parent thing to say heh.

[–] SwifferWetjet@thelemmy.club 6 points 13 hours ago

Work's pink multi surface cleaner. Never knew I'd know exactly what the fuck poison tastes like! Gotta say, pretty unpleasant

[–] radiofreebc@lemmy.world 5 points 14 hours ago

The word salad of Donald J Trump

[–] Sxan@piefed.zip 3 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

My cat had sneezed diectly onto my face.

[–] toynbee@piefed.social 1 points 2 hours ago

What, only the once?

[–] palordrolap@fedia.io 3 points 14 hours ago

It's about even between my own bodily functions under high pressure exit conditions ricocheting back or being spat at and getting some in my mouth.

I suppose I have been fortunate to avoid any worse combination of those.

[–] homes@piefed.world 0 points 11 hours ago
[–] bold_omi@lemmy.today -2 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

I've never been "sorayed".

[–] geekwithsoul@piefed.social 1 points 6 hours ago

You're just not trying hard enough