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Women are being abandoned by their partners on hiking trails. What’s behind ‘alpine divorce’?
(www.theguardian.com)
this post was submitted on 17 Mar 2026
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I went with my ex to a local waterfall once. It was pretty dry, so I wanted to explore the top of the falls a bit since it's normally not accessible. It's very flat up there, and I kept back from the edge since I don't like heights anyway, but she got mad at me for being up there since she didn't feel comfortable coming out with me.
So a couple minutes later, I'm done poking about, and I turn around and she's nowhere to be seen. Now I'm worried she went over the side and something happened to her. I started looking over the edge of the hill leading up to the falls and trying to see if she's down there, but there was enough water to still be spraying the rocks. My foot slides out on a wet patch, and now I'm falling down the rock face!
I crashed off at least 3 ledges on my way down, and was flipping over and trying to grab onto things to catch myself, but there was nothing but rock and moss, but I finally come to a stop. I have no clue how I didn't die or break anything. It was one of the scariest moments of my life. After I checked on my own life, I saw she wasn't there, so I made my way to the car. She was there just being annoyed.
She seemed to think I deserved it for not listening to her for saying it was dangerous, while it was not the activity I was doing that led to me falling, but that I thought I needed to be looking for her after she disappeared without saying she was going to the car. I don't think she must have realized it was not just one rock I fell off of, but probably at least 10+ feet of rock, but needless to say I wasn't very appreciative of her lack of concern. I was just grateful to be alive at that point. I was sore for a few days and had some bruises that lasted a couple months. Was I a jerk? I don't feel so, but I don't believe remote places in the outdoors are the place to put arguments ahead of everyone's safety either way. If I would have gotten hurt badly, who knows how long she would have sat there before looking for me.
Damn, you're both lucky things didn't go worse. "I told them it was too dangerous, then I left them alone anyway, and they died from their injuries" would be a hell of a thing to have on one's conscience, let alone one thing to admit on the defendant's stand.
I mean, you're (presumably) an adult who can take responsibility for your own actions, but if she was truly concerned for your safety, abandoning you makes no sense. No matter how skilled my partner might be, I'd be waiting at the edge watching like a hawk, not saying anything, just making sure their stunt didn't end the way I feared it would. There's plenty of time for arguments about it when we're both back on solid ground. Literally turning away and walking off at the height of a dangerous act while alone in nature doesn't say "I'm concerned about your safety" as much as it says "I'm emotionally-immature and can't prioritize your actual well-being above my personal feelings."
Glad to hear she's an ex.
You are very correct. We both could have regretted the events much more than we did.
When I see parents take their smaller children places, I count them as "not dangerous."
This is where I was.
People will photograph each other chilling there all the time. I don't want to get close enough to see over the edge since I don't like heights, I just wanted to walk on the creekbed.
This is still at the top of the falls, but more indicitive of the side of the falls where she "disappeared" on me and what I was looking for her in. What I bounced off on the way down was three or so of those big boulders to the right of the tree there.
IMO, that incident was ¾ your fault.
I'm sure I deserve partial credit. I was in a bad place mentally back then so I did a lot of stupid and inconsiderate things I regret. But I'm also now with someone who wouldn't walk away from me even when I am being an idiot because they care about my safety, so I learned a lot of lessons since then.