this post was submitted on 06 Sep 2025
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I’m 31, my husband is 51, and lately I’ve been feeling some baby fever. For the record, kids aren’t a must for me, I’m genuinely happy with or without them, but I think it would be nice to experience that journey. My husband is hesitant, though. Even though he’s very healthy, active, and energetic, he feels like having a child in his 50s might be too late. He also already has a 27-year-old son, and he worries that the big age gap between siblings would feel strange.

I guess I’m just looking to hear what others think about this situation.

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[–] wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 1 day ago

Look man, I get it. The world is heading to hell in a hand basket, and in a lot of ways accelerating towards it.

But there's a difference between awareness and... I guess feeling the "doom" of all of it constantly. Existing with that weight constantly pushing down on you. At least part of that is a choice.

Letting the weight of all of this impact you constantly is not a virtue. Do what you can to push back the oncoming waves where you can. Don't beat yourself up for not being able to hold back everything. And enjoy the joy and beauty where you can find them.

Living your life bent out of shape about things you can't do anything about is just wasting what little time you have, and wasting time while things are comparatively better than they're likely to be later.

And I get the need to speak out about all of it. But it doesn't help. What helps is getting involved with stuff locally, being active in local politics (to a degree, the rot and shitty lying politicians exist on local scales too). Doing what you can. Trying to discard the worry and upset about what you can't. Try to influence those close to you to do the same.