this post was submitted on 29 Oct 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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[–] slaacaa@lemmy.world 125 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

No pissposting in our shitposting community! πŸ˜‘β›”οΈ

[–] razen@lemmy.world 14 points 3 days ago (3 children)

We need pissposting community now

[–] Hupf@feddit.org 3 points 2 days ago

!pissposting@lemmy.world

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[–] DudleyMason@lemmy.ml 4 points 2 days ago

Lady, it's ok. You can just tell people you're into watersports. Anyone who'd judge you for that isn't a friend anyway. You don't have to pretend it's woo-woo medicine.

[–] TheArtfulLlama@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago
[–] elucubra@sopuli.xyz 46 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I slather shit in my armpits, usually masks the urine smell.

[–] Varesti@lemmy.zip 18 points 3 days ago

Ancient problems require ancient solutions.

[–] damnthefilibuster@lemmy.world 74 points 4 days ago (4 children)

She’s doing it wrong. You don’t leave it overnight and you do not spray it. Use it like an oil, massage it into your hair, rinse off in about 15 minutes.

Then your hair will fall off more evenly BECAUSE ITS A FUCKING ACID.

But seriously, next time you have a zit, put a little drop of piss on it. Just one dab. Zit will dry out in about 10 minutes flat. Then just rinse off and act like you didn’t just do that.

[–] ArmoredThirteen@lemmy.zip 56 points 3 days ago (2 children)

If it's acid/salt that helps with a zit I'd rather put a pinch of salt in some vinegar

[–] sum_yung_gai@programming.dev 116 points 3 days ago (5 children)

Sorry but you have to put the piss on your face... There is no other way.

[–] faythofdragons@piefed.social 17 points 3 days ago (1 children)

But what if I've got a buddy who's interested in helping?

[–] dontgogettingtooclever@piefed.social 19 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Do I have to do all the thinking around here?? Piss in their hand and then let them rub that on your face

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[–] Signtist@bookwyr.me 17 points 3 days ago

Doesn't work. I've been rubbing salt and vinegar potato chips on my face every day for a week, and my acne has never been worse!

[–] expletivedeleted@lemmy.zip 15 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Honestly, if you get athelete's foot, piss on your feet in the shower.

More fast acting than tinactin. Again, not joking. I suffered for months until I got that tip from a paraplegic who was an athlete previously.

Worked like a damn charm. I miss that dude.

And he could do pull-ups like it was no thing. It was amazing to watch him get out of bed.

But anyhow, pee on your feet in the shower if you have athlete's foot. Instant relief, and cures. Pissy Life Pro Tip.

[–] CultLeader4Hire@lemmy.world 12 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Athletes foot is super easily treated by OTC meds if you can’t clear it it’s probably because your shoes are colonized by the fungus

[–] bilb@lemmy.ml 10 points 3 days ago

Piss in the shoes, got it.

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[–] wolframhydroxide@sh.itjust.works 14 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

I'm fairly certain it's a base, not an acid, since the urea and uric acid break down into ammonia. Do you have more information? I'm not saying you're wrong about the effects, (if anything a base would be even worse) but I thought the caustic nature was why urine was traditionally used in leather tanning.

[–] jim_v@lemmy.world 10 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The PH of your urine can vary. Urine is also not sterile, so you are introducing waste products, bacteria, and salts directly into your skin holes. The urea concentration isn't especially high at 2%, compared with topical solutions that start at 5%. CeraVe and Eucarin both have a product with urea in them.

You are right, in that urea does break down into ammonia. So aged urine was used to tan hides, since the ammonia would break down the leftover fatty tissue/grease, and loosen all the hair and fibers.

So, since this is specifically aged urine that she's spraying on her scalp...

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[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 24 points 3 days ago (1 children)
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[–] j4yc33@piefed.social 53 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Excuse me, Kind Person, this is a pisspost and should not be in this Community.

[–] StupidBrotherInLaw@lemmy.world 31 points 3 days ago (1 children)

If you're a bird it's really both.

[–] Varesti@lemmy.zip 41 points 3 days ago (4 children)
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[–] thermal_shock@lemmy.world 26 points 3 days ago
[–] DangerNooble@lemmy.world 47 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Hi, yes, my eyes would like to press charges

[–] ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca 18 points 3 days ago

She's taking the piss with this one.

[–] Ninja876@lemmy.world 62 points 4 days ago (10 children)

Humans have been using their own urine to soften animal hair (wool) for over a thousand years. The British last name "Fuller" was their trade.

The would take the wool, soak it in urine and grape mash it with their feet to soften and make it more full.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fulling

Now would I do this to my own hair or the the "fulling" job? Never.

[–] StupidBrotherInLaw@lemmy.world 25 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

Fulling, urine collection, the Roman urine tax, Titus Flavius Vespasianus, and the Flavian dynasty. That link sent me on quite the trip down the Wikihole.

Edit: Fuller, Tucker, and Walker are all surnames suggesting your ancestors worked in piss.

[–] meme_historian@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Gonna enjoy a nice big tumbler of Johnny Walker later

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[–] Obituarykidney@lemmy.world 16 points 3 days ago

There was a dude that used to frequent the bar I worked in with the last name Fuller. We used to say he was fuller shit because he wouldn't shut the fuck up. If we saw him coming we would run, because the first bartender he started talking to was going to be stuck there for at least two hours listening to him ramble about his whisky collection.

The man was a hoarder and an alcoholic, once bragged about how he hid $30k worth of whisky uber his baby's crib so his wife wouldn't find it. And that's basically the gist of his rants, but they were unending.

This news put a smile on my face.

[–] Widdershins@lemmy.world 18 points 3 days ago

Fuller was the name of the kid who seemed proud of pissing the bed in Home Alone.

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[–] BradPitt@piefed.zip 21 points 3 days ago

If you meet a urine angel, then you know urine heaven.

[–] DonkeyStar@lemmy.world 21 points 3 days ago

Most of urine’s benefits can actually be attributed to reducing stress by not thinking.

[–] anon_8675309@lemmy.world 32 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Well, what I do is .. I don’t spray piss in my hair.

[–] BoosBeau@lemmy.world 11 points 3 days ago

thats a bit big-brained for us urine angels πŸ’¦ πŸ˜‡

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[–] IpsumLauren@lemmy.world 36 points 3 days ago

I'm going to start all my emails like that.

[–] over_clox@lemmy.world 20 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Mix powdered urine with your shampoo like the rest of us, about equal parts of both.

You can thank me later.

[–] Thteven@lemmy.world 34 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I put powdered urine in my urine to get more urine per urine.

[–] InGodWeThrust@lemmy.zip 13 points 3 days ago

My man aspiring to be a biblically accurate urine angel

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[–] Eat_Your_Paisley@lemmy.world 19 points 3 days ago (1 children)

My generation got weird as we got older

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[–] StillAlive@piefed.world 24 points 3 days ago

Literacy is a curse

[–] Cellari@lemmy.world 15 points 3 days ago

Bear Grylls would like to know your location

[–] Apytele@sh.itjust.works 27 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Apple cider vinegar does the same (acid closes the cuticle and will seal in any oil you apply first, then make the hair look smoother / shiner) but the rinsed-out scent is much less offensive and even works well with some of the earthier perfumes like patchouli.

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[–] Generica@lemmy.world 13 points 3 days ago (1 children)

This sounds like the worst reboot of Charlie's Angels ever

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[–] LazyOldPervert@lemmus.org 6 points 3 days ago

I've found the wrong Herbal Essences orgasm commercial

[–] HulkSmashBurgers@reddthat.com 9 points 3 days ago (1 children)

This some kinda kink I don't know about?

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