I don't really know about it in general but I remember two Catholic friends I had who were dating, the girl joked/hinted to her bf about how they should hurry up and get married so they could have sex...
this post was submitted on 06 May 2025
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What is catholic dating culture?
I’ve never heard these words used together.
It's where you try to find a partner that hates themselves as much as you do.
Sounds kinda hot actually
I thought that was the Jews.
Oral and butt stuff¹ before marriage, children and regret after.
- Depending on one's tastes and times. Your mileage may vary
Is there some kind of write-up or TL;DR for what “Catholic dating culture” is? How is it distinct from Protestant or any other Christian dating culture?
- marriage is awesome enough to warrant active effort in dating if one is called to marriage, but not at all costs
- standards can be good, even if it means staying single
- no shame or moral inferiority in being single, regardless of age
- marriage almost always should be with another catholic
- no premarital sex or cohabitation
- dating is for finding future spouse, but there's not too much rush in determining whether or not someone is that future spouse
- relatively wide variety in how long a couple dates before deciding to marry
- normal to date in high school, but some people are against it, and some actively encourage it
Edit: i forgot to mention agape
Aside from points 4 and 6 I don’t see how that could be specific to Catholics? Maybe I was raised too catholic to tell the difference though.
I didn't limit to only what's specific to Catholics. Also, I've heard that Mormons think it's a big deal to still not be married at a certain age because it affect which level of Heaven you enter.
Well my question was for clarification on the Catholic Dating Culture.
Your bullet points do not address that and as such you are not giving enough context to enable any kind of real answer from those of us who don’t know what you’re talking about. I tried searching for some kind of definition on my own but that only produces religious focused dating blogs.
Some of the listed things mean that Catholics might put more effort into finding someone, compared to secular dating. Also, people seem to see insanity in how Catholic dating connects to marriage, but I don't know exactly how that's perceived. I might not be familiar enough with other dating cultures to know what is relevant.
For context I guess, here's my views on the list you posted, as someone who is very much not religious and dated plenty before finding my fiancee:
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Marriage might be awesome for some, but it's also not for everyone, and there are far too many bad marriages that could've been good casual relationships
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Standards are definitely good to have, but I guarantee mine are very different than the average Catholic
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No shame in being single. Better to be single than in a toxic relationship just for the sake of a relationship.
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I probably couldn't see myself marrying a religious person, but if their beliefs don't infringe on other's rights then I guess they can do them.
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Sex is just sex, cohabitation is convenient, cheaper, and pleasant. I've never been married and I've lived more of my adult life with a roommate or partner than not. I also don't believe sex needs to be confined within the boundaries of a relationship either, and I have sex with people that aren't my fiancee, both with and without her, though that's definitely uncommon and always done with the full consent of all parties.
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Dating could be for finding a future spouse. It could also just be for fun, or for a casual relationship, or a long term relationship with no intent to marry.
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Relatively wide variety in how long people date before marriage, if ever. I never planned on it for years, but I met my fiancee and changed my mind. We dated for a year before getting engaged.
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Normal to date in highschool.
Obviously this is only my perspective. No judgement, to each their own. Other than the views on polyamory (though more accurately, just sex. Open relationship? I don't have a label for it), these opinions seem very common among the average dating population. My sample may be skewed since I'm bisexual and over half my relationships have been gay.
I'm curious, do you think of sex more as "like ice cream but better" or "like hugging but better"?
I wouldn't say either. Sex is way more intimate than just hugging. I'd say it's like "making out" but better. It's lots of fun, and I don't care about the societal norms restricting it between romantic partners. Pregnancy isn't a risk for me, and I'm very careful to avoid STDs. I haven't had sex with someone without a recent STD panel, and I use protection when necessary. My fiancee feels the same way, so I have sex with my friends all the time
Could you define those two things? I may state that church going Protestant dating is similar but without more info idk
I defined the first in another comment.
Incel-style pessimistic desperation: persistently sad because no girlfriend; horny; wants an easy short path to having girlfriend; making the other person happier is probably not part of why they start to want romance
It's not mistaken, no.
I think this is going to depend a lot on where in the world you are.
I'm from the mid Atlantic/northeast US, and was raised catholic, overall I wouldn't say that around me there was ever a separate "Catholic dating culture" it was just catholics dating other people who may or may not have also been Catholic. Not any more problematic than the rest of the general dating pool in any particular way
In other parts of the country or world I suspect that may be different
No
Pomegranates
I've never seen it described or practiced anything like that. If anything, I've seen it having almost the opposite reputation.
Edit: Ironicly had to look up some stats on sexuality for something unrelated, and the general consensus seems to be that Catholics have sex sooner and more often than even more non-religious people.
Are we talking about practicing Catholics or those that call themselves Catholic because they were baptised as a baby?
High risk high reward I guess. And it varies a lot because some are super hard core with latin and all, and some are pretty relaxed with it
In theory you're not supposed to have pre-marital sex (it probably happens all the time) and dating would tend to be more serious than casual. Going steady vs hooking up. So yeah I imagine having a relationship not work out carries more weight
But once you get past that you get a long lasting marriage, a family and all the positives that come with that