goldteeth

joined 2 years ago
[–] goldteeth@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 7 months ago

My class was set to graduate right around the time the pandemic hit and a lot of people ended up graduating late because the school literally couldn't offer the classes they needed to finish their degree. Anyone to whom your date of graduation is actually relevant likely isn't going to bat an eye at anyone who was in college within the last 5 years graduating a couple months late.

And, of course, there's that old stand-by moral of "the only reason it seems like all your peers are doing better is because the ones in the same situation as you aren't going on social media to brag about it." So don't rely on that as a metric too heavily.

[–] goldteeth@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Honestly, if I'm the defense, this has gotta be awesome, right? Now, I'm not a lawyer, but I have watched Boston Legal twice, so that's basically the same thing, and what I'm hearing is these people want to get up on the stand and show the jury a video which either:

A) to the particularly inattentive, shows the victim clearly alive, or

B) demonstrates that even video evidence can be completely fabricated from whole cloth, and the opposition is more than capable of doing so to serve their own interests

Barring the staggeringly unlikely event that the defendant goes full-on Perry Mason Perp and outright says "hey, sorry I killed you, man" to the hologram, this seems like a pretty sweet deal.

[–] goldteeth@lemmy.dbzer0.com 24 points 7 months ago

Or some scheming vice admiral with designs on world domination keeps claiming that fighter jets are falling off his aircraft carriers, to cover up the fact he's secretly smuggling them to the subterranean hangar under his island volcano lair...

[–] goldteeth@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

nah, see, you got

  1. self-aggrandizing unelected bureaucrat
  2. intentionally sabotaging government programs to make his own vanity project look better
  3. blind obsession with deeply-flawed and barely-functional technological monstrosity
  4. claims sole credit for his program's achievements despite, at best, hiring the guy that hired the guy that hired the guy to build the schematic that some other guy gave him
  5. definitely blackmailing his boss
  6. barely committed to his administration's political agenda beyond whatever inflates his own ego
  7. nazi cosplay
  8. not a real face

dude's not Vader, he's Tarkin. Vance is the moody teenager from bumfuck nowhere who suddenly started sucking the spiteful old warlock's dick despite years of going on about how much he hates his whole deal, likely screwing over his wife in the process, making him Vader. and I guess Obi-Wan is Pope Francis because Vance definitely killed him.

[–] goldteeth@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 7 months ago

How much food and what is it?

...Did we mention it doubles as a convenient dumping ground for mob snitches?

[–] goldteeth@lemmy.dbzer0.com 138 points 7 months ago (3 children)

in case you want to self-host your own algae, I guess

[–] goldteeth@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 8 months ago (2 children)

"Well I was trying to add Jeff Goldblum and your names are obviously right next to each other in my phone, so..."

[–] goldteeth@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 9 months ago

Seems like everyone's been getting that noise lately. I'm on my third.

[–] goldteeth@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 9 months ago

Where on earth would you find a wall on a road with a fotorealistic continuation of the road printed on it?

Spoken like a man who has never relentlessly pursued a roadrunner, nor taken a wrong turn at Albuquerque.

[–] goldteeth@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

"Djinn", specifically, being the correct word choice. We're way past fun-loving blue cartoon Robin Williams genies granting wishes, doing impressions of Jack Nicholson and getting into madcap hijinks. We're back into fuckin'... shapeshifting cobras woven of fire and dust by the archdevil Iblis, hiding in caves and slithering out into the desert at night to tempt mortal men to sin. That mythologically-accurate shit.

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