Police indifference to parking violations probably translates to police indifference towards vandalism. I carry a pocket knife. Two flats requires a tow.

Call the polizia municipale for removal

After being on hold for 35 minutes they tell you that there are no patrols available at the moment to come to see (although you remember seeing one parked in front of a nearby bar) but they will come to check as soon as possible.

"As soon as possible" they meant after 6 hours and the pick up is no more parked there

Btw I don't understand those that are buying this kind of penis enhancement devices (no. It's not used for work), parking spots in Italy aren't designed for this size. If you have anything longer than 4 meters it's hard to find a place. Getting a 5.5 meters vehicle just for showing off, it's simply masochism

Fun fact: you're not supposed to keep your hitch on when you're not towing because it is directly connected to your frame, which means you lose the protection of the crumple zones and the bumper. If a misplaced sledgehammer were to land on your hitch it could seriously bend your shit and warrant very expensive repairs

Post about it on the internet

There was someone that parked like this all the time when I lived in an apartment complex. I called the management office to complain, and they explained that their towing enforcement contract was only Monday to Friday, 9 to 5. You know, when everyone is at work, and therefore not parked.

The truck owner went on vacation, so her truck was parked like this on a Monday, and I called. The office worker decided they had to give a written warning first. So nothing ever happened with it.

Be grateful for such a beautiful day

A few lentils can be used under the valve caps to cause a slow liberation of air from the tires. No property damage, but quite an inconvenience to get refilled.

Not my idea, but I'd like to get a pad of fake tickets and write him up for parking like a dickhead.

Once, about 10 or 12 years ago, I was taking my handicapped girlfriend home from her infusion treatment (Multiple Sclerosis) so we stopped for lunch at Wendy's. We pull in just in time to see a couple of chuds pull into the last available handicapped space in a shiny new work truck (F 250 with tool boxes and ladder rack). We parked across the parking lot. Back then she could still walk with a cane (she's wheelchair-bound now). The two said chuds sat down to eat, but I had other plans. We took ours to go, and I nonchalantly keyed the fuck out of the side of his shiny red paint high up on the door. My plan, had he seen me, was to wait for the cops to come. I'd cop to the keying, but he would have gotten a $250 ticket for not having a placcard. I realize it was kinda dumb because people are fucking crazy, and here in the US half of them are probably packing.

Liquid from a can of Surströmming down the windshield. They won't be parking there permanently.

call and have it towed/ticketed? it won’t let a wheelchair pass.

Illegal things come to mind first.

But calling a tow company sounds like a great idea.

call a tow truck

1. Put a fake tow notice under the wiper so the owner thinks they have to move the truck.

2. Chain the axle to that fence back there and lock it.

3. Kick the driver's door so the alarm goes off.

Driver hears the alarm, checks out his truck, gets pissed about the busted door, sees the tow notice, goes to move the truck, and since they obviously have no idea or concern for anything behind them, doesn't check the vehicle and ends up dragging the fence (or if it is really well put in, breaking an axle.

I would kick

Drain all of their blinker fluid.

I had neighbours around me that did this shit regularly

I would drag a coin, walk over the bonnet with bouncy steps, break wing mirrors and the like

I had a spouse who required a wheelchair for a while, so I took it very personally

Roll my eyes and shake my head. Probably make a snarky comment to my companion if I was with someone.

Call the county for someone blocking ROW on a pedestrian route and watch them get the boot.

I used to dream of having a laser to cut the offending part off.

I'd walk behind it and not worry so much about not scratching the tailgate

I am outside with my dogs, I carry a bag of shit, I see garbage parking..

Slice open a huge bag of birdseed and toss it in the bed.

Pebble in air valve

order 5 large piccolos with a side of tuning cork

Lots of smack talk in here from the other side of the screen. Best malicious compliance is probably just call and report them for parking improperly. Or just walk across their car.

Wish I had the balls to scratch a little penis in the paintwork with my keys.

What I really do is make a picture (with visible license plate and added points for having a person in wheelchair with a sad face next to it) and send it to the city...

Call police, since our wheelchair cannot pass. They will have it towed gladly with a lot of pleasure. (The Netherlands hates these asahats)

Lawful good: call the police Chaotic good: sawzall the part that over hangs