I'm not a big fan of Ethan but he's the only one who knows how key aspects of our network architecture works and he does get back to his desk faster if you salt him.
this post was submitted on 28 Oct 2026
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once had a guy open his pants, tuck his penis down between his balls, turn it sideways 90 degrees, and called it a 'hamburguesa'
it was about 10 inches from my face
the military was interesting. i was not offended by this. maybe because i was already desensitized by then. who knows.
In my first unit, a game the folks in the motor pool liked to play was if you were bending over they would come up behind you and dry hump you. They called it taking cakes. Everyone seemed completely desensitized to it. I was glad I didn't work motor t.
Wow, thank fuck I decided against going to the military
None of those are harassment. You'd need to repeatedly ask them to stop (and them failing to do so) to configure harassment.
Except for Cindy, Cindy knew what she was doing.
I will "accidentally" her face next time, the daft cow.
Ethan didn't touch me without consent.
If he did, he'd be a bad little slug boy.
In real life, work harassment often looks like B. How many times has Cindy "accidentally" spilled coffee over you? She's just so clumsy lol lol.
Depends on the company. If you work at blizzard then you get the rape room or they send you to the bill cosby suite
Or steal your breast milk from the fridge..
I've lost count of how many "Ethan's" I've worked with over the years. /s
John is the boss and old, he just grew in another time.
Ethan is that weird guy that the company cannot afford to lose at any cost.
Evidently it is Cindy, and she will claim she was the victim, make false accusations and go on twitter.
/s
Then she'll make a GoFundMe and share it with the right wing twitterverse and raise millions from dumb fucks who think she's the ultimate victim of cancel culture just to have the GoFundMe shut down for fraud which then she'll go to Fox News and have 17 interviews over the course of 4 days before being hired as an administrative assistant for Pete Hegseth.
Ya know, at least Ethan isn't touching you
And for all I know, he was a bad little slug.
It's a very inclusive workplace.
John compared your promotion to cooked meat and is laying hands on you without warrant. John is harassing.
Cindy is on the clock and working. No complaints filed on her behalf regarding any cramped or confined work conditions. Cindy is doing well.
Ethan was contracted to clear a stuck pig diagnostic tool inside a petroleum industrial mainline pipe. He called for traction materials to his teammates so he could safely navigate thru the extreme challenging environment. Ethan is doing his job well.
Ethan is a bad little slug
These comments got me confused, yes John touches someone on the back, but like the back isn't sexually motivated?? All the answers are not harassment perse, at least not without some extra context. But when I read the comments I think that you all are just extra touch sensitive (possibly because of some worse experiences or with extra context, which is fair - don't get me wrong)
The back is where the butt is! We all know how that kind of thing ends!
The digestive tract "ends" at the butt, so what are you implying?
The commenters may be a tad sarcastic in their comments
every action that does not have a commercial purpose is inherently sexual, and therefore any such activity that is not allowed by the other person is sexual harassment.
however, you cannot ask another person what they are fine with because asking is in itself an activity and therefore potentially sexual harassment. so you'd have to ask the person first whether you can ask them ...
It’s called a joke, mon ami.
Thank you T_T
C isn't harassment it's just a nervous breakdown at work. The guy doing unsolicited touching on the other hand...
John is an asshole.
Cindy is clumsy.
Ethan provide a vital release of pent-up anger and frustration with the leadership.
You would not believe how many trainings like this one I completed with a score close to 100% just by picking the longest answers.
Oh man, that's a good point. The longest answer is likely either the ridiculous answer when you're supposed to catch the odd one out, or when you're supposed to pick the correct answer, then it's likely the nuanced take.
I had not thought about it this much yet, but I've definitely also started only reading the short answers, if none of the long answers sound right.
This reminds me of employee orientation I went through at an old job. There were videos on the usual things like sexual harrassment, workplace/industrial safety, etc.
The video on racial discrimination actually had some examples of what not to do.
What I remember was a white employee asking a black employee about why do mexicans always drive low riders, the black employee was all idk, white employee says “it’s so they can pick lettuce without having to get out of the car!”, and both laughed hysterically.
Those of us in the training room were looking at each other like ummmmm wtf?
So,
- someone googled "racist joke",
- decided to include it into a presentation on how not to be racist,
- decided they themselves don't want to be racist, so the joke should be told between people of different skin color, and
- at no point did they get up and just walk into the woods, never to return to human society again.
That's certainly not the choices I would've made, but sure.
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Inspired by the “Diversity Day” episode of The Office, no doubt.
I know this is a joke, but what the actual fuck is that slug story. I am laughing my ass off reading it 😂.
Every workplace has one.
Ethan is not touching you in any way, he's just doing his own thing, so the answer must be A or B. Depends if you hate Cindy or John more.
But Ethan does ask me to throw salt on him and I really don't like the way he moans when I oblige.
Obviously A. Ethan didn't touch me, and Cindy only on accident.
Also I wasn't promoted, so that pervert John must be insinuating that he can get me promoted in exchange for unspecified “services”. I wouldn't feel safe around him.
A.
Clearly, A.
none of these are harassment?
He’s a bad little slug. 😏
Hey, John, keep your gods damned hands to yourself you fucking creep. Hope you have a good attorney.
I got one once where you got an email (when sending "fun" emails was a thing) with a racist joke. What to do??
A) report
Etc.
C) forward to the team
D) forward to the team, But only of it was really funny
😬
Ethan covered himself in oil
It must be Wednesday; I could never get the hang of Wednesdays... --Douglas Adams
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